Alright….SO…I’d like to take a few minutes to discuss our vocabulary. I never tell people how to live their lives. I just don’t. I’ve screwed mine up enough for ten people, so I’ve got no right to try to dictate to others. I will, however, make suggestions if I think I can help. If you can sit long enough to read the ramblings of a madman, maybe these little adjustments to the way we communicate with each other and ourselves will change the way you approach life.
It Is What It Is.
Those words have become a catchphrase that is all too common in our society. You probably hear that phrase a few times a day in casual conversation. You hear it in movies. You hear it in music. I’ve heard it uttered in military matters, politics, sports, academics and courtrooms.
I get it…it’s a short and semi-cool way of saying that this is the best a particular thing or situation will get under the current circumstances.
It Is What It Is.
I cringe just writing it. Every time I hear it, I can’t stop that furrow from developing in my brow. If I hear it more than once in a conversation, I can feel my pulse in my temples and although nobody’s ever commented and I haven’t checked a mirror, I’d bet those veins are protruding.
It Is What It Is.
No. It’s Not. It IS what you accept. It IS what you decide to allow. It IS something that’s been deemed unworthy of further time or effort. It IS complacency, It IS laziness, It IS a lack of motivation, foresight and tenacity. That little catch-phrase is nothing more than a societal indicator of the acceptance of mediocrity.
Far too many of us have lost sight of the fact that we are the dominant species on this planet. We are the masters of our domain and every little atomic particle that moves within it. We control the destiny of whatever IT is.
It is never…what it is. It is what we’ve made it…it is what we’ve allowed it to be. But to say something along those lines, would be an admission of the fact that we’ve accepted sub-standard performance, and that would reflect negatively on our own self-esteem and our appearance in the eyes of others. It’s easier to just blame “It” for being faulty, substandard, imperfect or just plain wrong. By accepting “It Is What It Is”, we shift the focus from our inability or lack of motivation to put in the work in order to make the situation or product better than it currently is.
Please…STOP IT.
Quit using that phrase. Quit accepting that phrase from the people you lead or deal with. I understand that society has come to a point where it accepts complacency, but you don’t have to ride that bus. You are a member of the dominant species on planet Earth. You are at the very top of the food chain because your ancestors refused to believe that “It Is What It Is”. From first the pointy stick used as a spear to collect food, through the steam engine, the cotton gin, the automobile and all the way to the personal computer and smartphone, we’ve never accepted “It Is What It Is”. The Universe has gifted you a beautiful mind and a functional body. It would be a crying shame to go through life and never fully understand the power contained within you simply because it was a societal norm to accept that “It Is What It Is”.
Have & Get
These two require a little bit of a background story to get the proper perspective. I’ll use extreme examples because I’ve witnessed extreme situations, but if you think about it, we’ve all seen things in our lives that justify the need to adjust how we use these words. These are a little disheartening, but there’s a reason I’m sharing them. Here we go….just bear with me for a minute.
I’ve known Marines who were world class athletes until they lost limbs in combat.
I’ve been in villages where children toted water that you wouldn’t use to water your flowers more than a mile every day to drink and cook with for their family’s survival.
I’ve seen the crushed souls of a group of young ladies as their spirit dies and their hopes dissipate after the Taliban destroyed the school that had just been built for them.
I’ve walked through the devastated remnants of cities after a war. Every structure destroyed. Every piece of infrastructure annihilated. Every inkling of civilization seemingly erased from existence.
I’ve watched far too many young women sob uncontrollably over flag draped coffins, while holding on tightly to the children who would grow up without their father in their life.
Okay….sorry about that…but like I said, it was kinda necessary for the proper perspective.
NOW…Thankfully, most of us haven’t witnessed things like that firsthand. But we’ve all seen the kids who need fed. We’ve all seen the people who don’t know how they’re going to recover after a catastrophe of some sort. You never have to look far to find someone less fortunate than you. So…we should all be able to relate to the proper use of Have & Get.
It’s really a simple concept. You consider how fortunate you are, then exchange one word for the other. In turn, you change your entire attitude. Aaannnddd….believe it or not, Positive Mental Attitude is 90% of the battle in most of the situations we face in life.
I’ll walk through my list of perspective prompts from above and show you how it works.
I never HAVE to go to the gym. I GET to go to the gym.
I never HAVE to pay the water bill. I GET to pay the water bill.
I never HAVE to go to class. I GET to go to class.
I never HAVE to work on the house. I GET to work on the house.
I never HAVE to spend time with friends and family. I GET to spend time with friends and family.
Every time you find yourself dreading something that needs to be done, take a minute to think it through and swap those two words. I promise that at the bare minimum, you’ll at least feel better about the task at hand. Even if you don’t fully enjoy it (i.e. Leg Day or Communication Theory Class), you’ll have a better appreciation of the fact that you live in the land of the free and the home of the brave and have opportunities that a lot of people can’t even fathom.
SO…here’s a little interesting tid-bit about “It Is What It Is” and “Have & Get”….changing them is contagious. You’ll always have the Eyeores in life that accept mediocrity and feel that every opportunity is an unbearable task. But your positive mental attitude will infect those around you. If you take the time to explain why it simply really NEVER is what it is, and why you GET to mow the yard this afternoon, you’ll make people think…and that’s the first step to opening their mind to a positive mental attitude that could change their lives, and every life they touch.
HEY…I can’t stress this enough…Don’t forget who we are. We are the dominant species on this planet. We’re the top of the food chain. And being Americans we’re at the very tippy-top of that food chain. The Universe has bestowed upon us minds and bodies with immeasurable potential. Change or lose a few words in your vocabulary and change your entire attitude. Unlock that potential…don’t be afraid to change the world.